Detox: Day 10

Today was up and down.  It started out really well, was up at 6:30 made my shake and off to the gym by 7:30.  I like the gym in the morning it’s quiet.  I was able to get in a full workout before I had to get home for the 9am portion of my cleanse.  When I got home I did some work then I started feeling down.  I got on the scale against my better judgement and I was up a pound and a half.  I knew I shouldn’t have gotten on the scale because I am supposed to weigh in on Tuesdays but for some reason I just couldn’t resist it today.  Why did I do that?  My day went down hill from there.

I spent the rest of the day depressed and sulking about my gained pound.  I pin pointed it to the other night when I ate those loaded mashed potatoes.  I knew I shouldn’t have indulged.  I mean it’s not like I have any room for error.  Now I have to work extra hard this week to meet my goal for Tuesday.  I hate how hard it is to lose weight and how easy it is to gain.  I wish I had better self-control.  I wish that I didn’t hate looking at myself in the mirror.  Today I wanted to smash the mirror and that scale.  I wish I would have caught myself before I gained so much weight.  My self-esteem has never been so low.

I decided to do two-a-day gym trips for the rest of the month.  That along with my cleanse should speed up this weight loss.  I have to get rid of these extra pounds so I can start feeling like myself again. 😦

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