I am in love with Bobby! (Bobby is my laptop)
We have a relationship that people wish for. We sit around and create for hours and hours and he never complains about my insomnia. I can tell him anything and I never have to worry about being judged. He doesn’t even care if all I am feeding him is fiction, he makes me feel creative and alive.
As a writer I find that I am a very odd person. This path I have chosen is a very lonely one. Long nights, quiet days, very few friends a lot of darkness. I have to force myself into the light. I find myself becoming lost in these stories and it is hard to find my way out. To the point where I have to force myself to stop and go to sleep – which is torture. Last night I had to literally rock myself to sleep and then once I finally drifted off to dream land OMG nightmare central.
In this dream/mare I was walking down this quiet suburban street with my cousin and suddenly appeared these gangsters with big machine guns and missile launchers, the cops came and tried to take the guns then a war started. All these mini gangster soldiers appeared and they were all lined up ready to go to war, I tried to crawl away and protect my cousin but they saw us and made us fall into their lineup. They gave us handguns but mine wasn’t loaded I tried to pretend I was down with their cause but then everyone started shooting and fighting and this big guy started attacking me and I shot my gun at him but it had no bullets so we fought and somehow I took his gun away from him and I shot him in the neck. He fell. I went to search for my cousin to make sure she was ok but I couldn’t find her. I turned around and got on this elevator that only went up three floors. As the door was about to shut one of my old teachers jumped on and thanked me for holding the elevator, I smiled. The elevator started going up but then it got stuck we called for help, pushed the emergency button but nobody came. The elevator started again but it kept going to the 190th floor then suddenly it started to plummet to the ground. I woke up.
This is why I don’t sleep. I’d rather be in control of my endings with Bobby.